mondays crap

A weekend in numbers:

Number of blinds I successfully managed to have crashing down: 1. This time they were in the kitchen.

Number of glasses shattered: 2. One was shattered during the blind-crashing fiasco. The second glass shattered when I was trying to replace the paper towel holder because that�s the leading cause of glass breakage.

Number of hours spent trying to find a parking space in downtown D.C.: 1.5 During which time I had consumed � pot of coffee and two diet cokes. I seriously thought about pulling over and peeing in the street, however I didn�t want to attract any water-sports enthusiasts.

During the whole blinds debacle, I went downstairs to smoke and in doing so, I hoped to run across the maintenance man since the storage room is in our building. I ran into him and asked about putting up the blinds. He said it wasn�t a problem, but on Saturday they only take care of emergencies and the rental office wouldn�t give them the notification about it until next week. Figuring it was something that only required as screwdriver, I asked for the parts to do it myself. While in there I noticed they also had knobs to put on the stove. Except for 400, the knob that we currently have has no numbers on it. Cooking in the oven is more of a guessing game really so you just put it a little past 400 and hope for the best. I was still smoking and holding my coffee as he�s trying to give me parts to hang the blinds. He then decides it�s a good idea for me to just take some of the longer screws so they will hold well. I have keys, random screws, three kits to hang blinds, and my cigarette in my mouth.

In addition to the numbers there was another good conversation between Dr. C and myself. This one had to do with my preparations for Monday morning.

Dr. C: So what else are you going to do tonight?

Me: Well, I have to take out the trash, set out my clothes, make coffee for the morning, and clean the container I heat my soup up in.

Dr. C: �.

Me: What?

Dr. C: Didn�t you ad an extra �up� in that sentence or shouldn�t you say �dogg� at the end?

Me: What?

Dr. C: keep your soup up in?

Me: No�that I *heat* my soup up in�not *keep* my soup up in. I�m not that ghetto.

Dr. C: *uncontrollable laughter*

Me: I�m surprised that�s what you thought I said considering I said it with such a straight face.

Dr. C: *uncontrollable laughter*

I then took out the trash and cleaned out the Rubbermaid container I HEAT my soup up in.

This morning I went to the post office and mailed tax returns. I will hopefully be reaping the benefits of that right quick. I�m hoping two weeks. I was talking to the woman who was selling me the stamps and she dropped something, came up from the ground and said all raspy �this has been the Monday from HELL.� I told her that there was still enough time in the day to turn things around, because I like to be annoying like that to some people. She wasn�t havin� it. It was going to a living hell regardless. I suppose the counter at the post office is hell anyway you slice it.

Over the next three weeks my boss will be in the office three days. Today is one of them. I can tell you right now that I�m having my own little countdown to no gopher going on in my head. There�s only two more days to go. My goal is to get another job, give my two-week notice, and be outta here by the time he gets back. *THAT* would make my year. Wish me luck.

e.