sucky

Once at gymnastics camp I was chased down the walking trail by a peahen who had apparently just had some eggs hatch. How was I to know? My question is why the hell this �camp� chose to have peacocks for the love of god. Was there something that made us perform better or learn more skills while at camp? The mountains of Pennsylvania don�t really scream �peacock farm� to me.

Other animals I have been chased by:

1. A german shepard when I was three years old. The owner kept telling me to stop running�ok bitch, whatever, I�m 3 years old.

2. A team of ducks. At my grandmothers house in California. They�d be all nice to your face, but turn around and walk away and they�ll lower their heads and go for the ankles. Unlike the peahen you can hear the ducks running after you because their webbed feet make a nice slapping sound against the pavement.

3. A spider. I�m not sure I would count it as being chased, but it was walking in my general direction and I took that as a warning sign that it was going to kick my ass�so I ran�I ran to get the vacuum and sucked that bad mother-fucker up so fast it didn�t know what hit him. I normally wouldn�t do that, but it was craptasically large.

4. My cat Gonzo.

My thoughts on Ashton and Demi:

She�s gonna be real sorry when Ashton punks her and says �Whoops! Nevermind Striptease, I was just in it for the 40 yr. old cooter.�

I�m tired today and I think this just took the last ounce of strength to post this. Consider yourselves lucky.

e.